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A little Light moment
- DeirdreKelleghan
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- IFAS Social Media Officer
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18 years 5 months ago #29911
by DeirdreKelleghan
A little Light moment was created by DeirdreKelleghan
In The Beginning
  In the Beginning God created heaven and the earth. Quickly he was faced with a class action suit for failure to file an environmental impact statement. He was granted a temporary permit for the project, but was stymied with the cease and desist order for the earthly part.
  Appearing at the hearing, God was asked why he began his earthly project in the first place. He replied that he just liked to be creative. Then God said, "Let there be light", and immediately the officials demanded to know how the light would be made. Would there be strip mining? What about thermal pollution? God explained that the light would come from a huge ball of fire. God was granted provisional permission to make light, assuming that no smoke would result from the ball of fire: that he would obtain a building permit; and to conserve energy, would have the light out half the time. God agreed and said he would call the light "Day" and the darkness "Night". Officials replied that they were not interested in semantics.
  God said, "Let the earth bring forth green herb and such as many seed". The EPA agreed so long as native seed was used. Then God said, "Let waters bring forth creeping creatures having life; and the fowl that may fly over the earth". Officials pointed out this would require approval from the Department of Game coordinated with the Heavenly Wildlife Federation and the Audubongelic Society.
  Everything was fine until God said he wanted to complete the project in Six days. Officials said it would take at least 200 days to review the application and impact statement. After that there would be a public hearing. Then there would be 10-12 months before...
  At this point God created Hell. :mrgreen:
Deirdre Kelleghan
Irish Astronomical Society
www.irishastrosoc.org
  In the Beginning God created heaven and the earth. Quickly he was faced with a class action suit for failure to file an environmental impact statement. He was granted a temporary permit for the project, but was stymied with the cease and desist order for the earthly part.
  Appearing at the hearing, God was asked why he began his earthly project in the first place. He replied that he just liked to be creative. Then God said, "Let there be light", and immediately the officials demanded to know how the light would be made. Would there be strip mining? What about thermal pollution? God explained that the light would come from a huge ball of fire. God was granted provisional permission to make light, assuming that no smoke would result from the ball of fire: that he would obtain a building permit; and to conserve energy, would have the light out half the time. God agreed and said he would call the light "Day" and the darkness "Night". Officials replied that they were not interested in semantics.
  God said, "Let the earth bring forth green herb and such as many seed". The EPA agreed so long as native seed was used. Then God said, "Let waters bring forth creeping creatures having life; and the fowl that may fly over the earth". Officials pointed out this would require approval from the Department of Game coordinated with the Heavenly Wildlife Federation and the Audubongelic Society.
  Everything was fine until God said he wanted to complete the project in Six days. Officials said it would take at least 200 days to review the application and impact statement. After that there would be a public hearing. Then there would be 10-12 months before...
  At this point God created Hell. :mrgreen:
Deirdre Kelleghan
Irish Astronomical Society
www.irishastrosoc.org
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- voyager
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- Super Giant
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18 years 5 months ago #29912
by voyager
My Home Page - www.bartbusschots.ie
Replied by voyager on topic Re: A little Light moment
LOL ... I like it!
My Home Page - www.bartbusschots.ie
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- pmgisme
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- Red Giant
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18 years 5 months ago #29913
by pmgisme
Replied by pmgisme on topic Re: A little Light moment
Sounds a bit like "Un-Intelligent Design" to me.
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- Seanie_Morris
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18 years 5 months ago #29918
by Seanie_Morris
Midlands Astronomy Club.
Radio Presenter (Midlands 103), Space Enthusiast, Astronomy Outreach Co-ordinator.
Former IFAS Chairperson and Secretary.
Replied by Seanie_Morris on topic Re: A little Light moment
Funny read, thanks Deirdre! I'd like to see the Irish Co. Co. version!
Midlands Astronomy Club.
Radio Presenter (Midlands 103), Space Enthusiast, Astronomy Outreach Co-ordinator.
Former IFAS Chairperson and Secretary.
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- JohnMurphy
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- Super Giant
18 years 5 months ago #29938
by JohnMurphy
Clear Skies,
John Murphy
Irish Astronomical Society
Check out My Photos
Replied by JohnMurphy on topic Re: A little Light moment
Nice one!
Clear Skies,
John Murphy
Irish Astronomical Society
Check out My Photos
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- finnjim2001
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18 years 5 months ago #29969
by finnjim2001
And god created shovels. and lo he created saws to allow the users of the hole"y" and clean shovels to make them elbow height to lean upon. and they saw that all was right with the lord :lol:
Somedays you're the dog,
Somedays you're the lamp post.
Replied by finnjim2001 on topic Re: A little Light moment
Funny read, thanks Deirdre! I'd like to see the Irish Co. Co. version!
And god created shovels. and lo he created saws to allow the users of the hole"y" and clean shovels to make them elbow height to lean upon. and they saw that all was right with the lord :lol:
Somedays you're the dog,
Somedays you're the lamp post.
Please Log in or Create an account to join the conversation.
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